Monday, November 13, 2017

Let your strongest muscle be the will

Busy semester with heavy workload -never a good combination. Much regrets even until now for taking up 5 modules for this semester. Looking back, what was I thinking? A hero wannabe? Push my limits? Hahahaha, sot.
No-life weekend, 1 down and 1 more to go.
So goong goong. I thought my papers were today and tomorrow but a double-check at my planner told me otherwise (tomorrow and Wednesday). Good thing I checked, if not I would have gone to school for NOTHING.
Sigh pie, can imagine my stress level. Literally coped up the whole day in the room while others enjoyed their activities. Can't wait for the exams to be over.


After that can bounce already, HAHAHA!


Why is it that the invitation to the girlfriends' meet up is extended to the partners? Correct me if I am wrong but the ones I am having a friendship with are the LADIES and not the guys. What's the purpose of bringing your boyfriends to the meet up? I thought it was a ladies' night out.
No, I am not bitter or salty about not having one but dude, we have not seen each other in a while. There should be lots of catch ups, gossips or whatever nots but with strangers there (can't blame me, I know them but I don't know them well enough like the ladies), we will not be as engaging. The least you guys can do is, er, maybe ask me if I am ok with it? Am I ok to be the third wheel, the extra light bulb? Me awkward much?
Going to get married next year and you will see him for the rest of your life. Is there a need to be so attached? ("/)
If the future meet ups are going to be like this, I am going to start compiling 101 excuses to give it a miss. I mean, what's the point right? The current situation is not as if we are close, unlike the past.
Sigh. So not looking forward to the 25th.
Maybe I will fake being unconscious or something, tsk.

Monday, October 30, 2017

Life is really an unpredictable journey

Just this morning, I learned of a colleague's health condition. One day while working, she felt uncomfortable so she headed to the nearest polyclinic. On that same day, she got admitted and has been in and out of the hospital (to drain the water out of her lungs) ever since. This was weeks ago.

The diagnosis was stage 4 lung cancer. What was even shocking was the suddenness of it. There was not a single symptom or warning prior to the diagnosis. She has always been fine -doesn't smoke, happy-go-lucky etc which was why I was totally caught off guard by the news.

When I returned, I was told that one of the clients passed away.

Yup, all within the span of an hour.

As I type this with an extremely heavy heart, I can't help but ponder on the fact that life is really really unpredictable. You could be in a pink of health right now but the next health check-up may prove you wrong. You could be heading home after work just like any other day but you may not make it home. I am not dwelling on the negativity, or at least that was what I told myself. I am thinking, if any of these happens to me, what will happen? I admit, I am not ready to meet the Heavenly Papa in heaven yet. I know I have tons of goals unchecked on my list.

Now I know why people tend to avoid working with elderly. The grief not an easy matter. The handling of emotions and the acceptance that death is part of life on earth -I am still trying to come to terms with it. I have some clients I am close with and I can't imagine receiving their negative news -the feeling will be like losing my grandparents all over again.

Will I be able to handle when the time comes?

Monday has officially been ruined...

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Look to the LORD and his strength; seek his face always

Thank you Lord, this win is yours. 

I wasn't expecting to win but through Your guidance, the women's team clinched the champion title.

Well done people, all the hard work and countless suicides paid off! Though there were matches where some of us did not perform, I'm glad we got each other's back(s) and side(s). Compared to last year's SUNIG, we did better and the chemistry among the team is obvious. Thank you for giving me a chance to play with you people. I know my attendance is one of the worst due to work and school but you guys ladies accepted me.

God, I hope that I shined for You through this competition. Thank you for the mental and physical strength to last through the matches. Casting my nervousness and fears onto You while drawing strength and peace, knowing that You are there with me, with us.

Everything that I have and everything I became is because of the strength of the Lord, and through him I have accomplished everything. Not because of my strength. Only by His love, his mercy and his strength.

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

First love is only a little foolishness and a lot of curiosity

If back then I did not end things, would we have lasted?
Or would we still go separate ways?

Oh well, we were young and immature back then.
I make mistakes, you make mistakes, he makes mistakes, they make mistakes.
Being reckless, I did not think things through and thought only for myself.
Hey, I was just a 15 years old girl who wanted to have fun while growing up.
Can't really blame me, right?

Nonetheless, thank you.

Whatever that will happen, will happen.
Until then.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

The speed of the boss is the speed of the team

SMU Invitational 2017

Sort of a last minute decision to join this mixed competition.
It wasn't easy because we were there literally for 12 hours, mentally and physically drained from the waits and matches. Great job on maintaining the winning streak for all of the mixed competitions we have participated in so far.
Well, I didn't really perform but it has been a good recce session as SUniG 2017 will be held there. Thank you to the rest of the team for covering my front, back and sides. Age is probably catching up to me, haha! Maybe it is time for me to retire and let the younger ones take over.

But yay to being champion and thank God for strength and support.


Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Time flies over us, but leaves its shadow behind

It's pretty scary to know how quickly time flies.

It has been 2 years since I have started my career in the social service sector. Honestly, I have never seen myself going into this industry, more so being a youth worker especially after working 1 year in Dunman Secondary School. 

But look, God does wonders. This is not a route that I would have chosen for myself. This job was practically God-given and I will always be thankful for that. However, there is always an end to everything.

I have gained a lot during my time here, from colleague and intern-turned-friends to the art of handling youths. These are valuable experiences that I will keep close to my heart. I have grown a lot to the point where it is time for me to venture into another area- an area where I have always wanted to serve and that is the elderly. 

I applied for different fields, some related to my current studies, some related to my current job. I prayed (still praying, actually) for God's plan to be revealed, I prayed (and again, still praying), asking God not to open so many doors so that I will not get confused, I prayed (yes, still praying) and gave (still giving) thanks for the blessing showered. 

31 July 2017 is the end of the YDC chapter in my life.

1 August 2017; what come may.
I am excited to start another journey, a new chapter.
Yes, I am fearful of the unknowns but I have God on my side
and He is all I need.


Tuesday, June 13, 2017


Mediators are dreamy idealists, and in the pursuit of the perfect relationship, this quality shows strongest. Never short on imagination, Mediators dream of the perfect relationship, forming an image of this pedestalled ideal that is their soul mate, playing and replaying scenarios in their heads of how things will be. This is a role that no person can hope to fill, and people with the Mediator personality type need to recognize that nobody’s perfect, and that relationships don’t just magically fall into place – they take compromise, understanding and effort.

Mediator romantic relationships

Love All, Trust a Few, Do Wrong to None

Fortunately these are qualities that Mediators are known for, and while it can be a challenge to separate long-fostered fantasy from reality, Mediators’ tendency to focus their attention on just a few people in their lives means that they will approach new relationships wholeheartedly, with a sense of inherent value, dedication and trust.

Mediators share a sincere belief in the idea of relationships – that two people can come together and make each other better and happier than they were alone, and they will take great efforts to show support and affection in order to make this ideal a reality.

But Mediators aren’t necessarily in a rush to commit – they are, after all, Prospecting (P) types, and are almost always looking to either establish a new relationship or improve an existing one – they need to be sure they’ve found someone compatible. In dating, Mediators will often start with a flurry of comparisons, exploring all the ways the current flame matches with the ideal they’ve imagined. This progression can be a challenge for a new partner, as not everyone is able to keep up with Mediators’ rich imagination and moral standards – if incompatibilities and conflict over this initial rush mount, the relationship can end quickly, with Mediators likely sighing that “it wasn’t meant to be.”

As a relationship takes hold, people with the Mediator personality type will show themselves to be passionate, hopeless romantics, while still respecting their partners’ independence. Mediators take the time to understand those they care about, while at the same time helping them to learn, grow and change. While Mediators are well-meaning, not everyone appreciates what can come across as constantly being told that they need to improve – or, put another way, that they’re not good enough. Mediators would be aghast to find that their intents were interpreted this way, but it’s a real risk, and if their partner is as averse to conflict as Mediators themselves, it can boil under the surface for some time before surfacing, too late to fix.

Better Three Hours Too Soon Than a Minute Too Late

This aversion to conflict, while contributing greatly to stability in the relationship when done right, is probably the most urgent quality for Mediators to work on. Between their sensitivity and imagination, Mediators are prone to internalizing even objective statements and facts, reading into them themes and exaggerated consequences, sometimes responding as though these comments are metaphors designed to threaten the very foundations of their principles. Naturally this is almost certainly an overreaction, and Mediators should practice what they preach, and focus on improving their ability to respond to criticism with calm objectivity, rather than irrational accusations and weaponized guilt.

But that’s at their uncommon worst – at their best, Mediators do everything they can to be the ideal partner, staying true to themselves and encouraging their partners to do the same. Mediators take their time in becoming physically intimate so that they can get to know their partners, using their creativity to understand their wants and needs, and adapt to them. People with this personality type are generous in their affection, with a clear preference for putting the pleasure of their partners first – it is in knowing that their partners are satisfied that Mediators truly feel the most pleasure.